I’ve had a lot of feelings the past few days. Being a musician, you might assume that I could just vent these through playing my viola, but it’s never really worked like that. Whenever I’ve tried, I usually just end up crying, unable to play, and my instrument runs the risk of getting (more) tear-stained. On the other hand, one way that playing does help is if I work on drilling passages, so the focus becomes more on the task at hand rather than what’s running through my mind.
The music that I’ve been working on lately is for a musical that starts next week in San Antonio. There are some really tricky parts in it that make me nervous, plus it runs for a month, so I’ll be staying at my parents’ house instead of commuting. I mean, I’m lucky to have a place to stay, but you know how parents can be when you’re within range. They worry if you’re not home by a certain time, want to know your dinner plans, make you keep your door open, etc., even when you’re 32 years old. (Maybe that’s just me?) Kind of dreading that.
So between those things and the excessive emotions, I’m basically a mess right now.
