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I’ve had a lot of feelings the past few days. Being a musician, you might assume that I could just vent these through playing my viola, but it’s never really worked like that. Whenever I’ve tried, I usually just end up crying, unable to play, and my instrument runs the risk of getting (more) tear-stained. On the other hand, one way that playing does help is if I work on drilling passages, so the focus becomes more on the task at hand rather than what’s running through my mind.

The music that I’ve been working on lately is for a musical that starts next week in San Antonio. There are some really tricky parts in it that make me nervous, plus it runs for a month, so I’ll be staying at my parents’ house instead of commuting. I mean, I’m lucky to have a place to stay, but you know how parents can be when you’re within range. They worry if you’re not home by a certain time, want to know your dinner plans, make you keep your door open, etc., even when you’re 32 years old. (Maybe that’s just me?) Kind of dreading that.

So between those things and the excessive emotions, I’m basically a mess right now.

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Yesterday, I decided to bake (myself away with) some banana bread. It’s not something I make very often because it feels like I’ve baked it so many times in the past. These days, overripe bananas usually end up in the freezer for smoothies, but there’s something familiar and comforting that drew me to baking a loaf this time.

If you have bourbon, brown bananas, and the blues, make the banana bread from Joy the Baker‘s first cookbook. It’s the classic that you crave, but with booze and chocolate chips that make it a little more indulgent, yet not overly sweet. My grandma recently gave me a jar of pecans from the tree in her front yard, so I used those instead of walnuts. Otherwise, I made it to a T and it came out pretty perfectly.

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Luckily I have a couple roommates helping me eat this loaf.

Maybe I should learn how to knit to get me through this month? Ooh, or I’ve been eyeing this quilting project. (Yep, 32 going on 80 over here.)

PS / TMI: In PMS mode right now, so that’s contributing to/exaggerating the feels. No worries.

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